When Captain America throws his mighty shiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeld...

More scripts featuring Captain Ash! At least, that was the name I coined since "Bruce Campbell as Captain America" just was too bloody long.

This one, once again, was on 5 July 2007:


By popular demand (from the one other person who actually comes to read the stuff we post here): More of Bruce Campbell's misadventures as the Star Spangled Centurion - Captain Ash!


Panel 1 - Captain Ash and Iron Man, standing some distance away, like one of those showdowns you see in Westerns. (Camera angle: Perhaps starting from Iron Man's waist, and you see Captain America in the background. To emphasise that it's a "Western" kind of showdown, you could have one of those dust balls blowing across the panel)

Dialogue box: "And now: Outtakes and deleted scenes from Bruce Campbell's Captain America audition tape!"

BC: "Buckle up ironhead, coz you're going for a ride!"


Panel 2 - Captain Ash throws his shield towards Iron Man, who easily evades it.

Dialogue box (musical lyrics, so if you could add a note or two beside the text to indicate it's music...): "When Captain America throws his mighty shiiiiiieeeeld....."

BC: "That's it, go ahead and run. Run home and cry to mama!"


Panel 3 - Iron Man sticks out his tongue at Captain Ash with the words "neener neener" surrounding his head. Don't ask how Iron Man can stick his tongue out through his helmet...

Iron Man: "That the best you can do? Haha, you're a jerk! You're a goody little two-shoes!"


Panel 4 - Close up on Captain Ash's face. He has a raised eyebrow, a la The Rock.

Off panel Iron Man voice balloon: "Goody little two-shoes!"


Panel 5 - Captain Ash's expression has changed to anger. He reaches for the boomstick strapped to his back.

Off panel Iron Man voice balloon: "Goody little two-shoes!"


Panel 6 - Captain Ash shoots Iron Man in the face...metallic helmet pieces fly everywhere and we can see part of Iron Man's brain exploding out! A big caption of "BANG!" can be placed somewhere in the panel.

Iron Man: "Goody lit..."


Panel 7 - Captain Ash stands over the body of Iron Man and kicks him in the nuts.

BC: "I'm not THAT good."