As I said previously, 5 June 2007 must have been the most productive day of my short comic strip scriptwriting "experiment"! I wrote a whole bunch of strips dedicated to two characters in pop culture/comics/entertainment that I really love...but you'll have to wait until tomorrow to find out who they are!
I had previously not written anything about Marvel characters, and since I'm pretty much a Marvel guy, I thought I'd spotlight arguably the most popular Marvel character of all time, Spider-man notwithstanding.
Wolverine's "I'm the best there is at what I do" line is perhaps one of the most used and re-used lines in comic-dom, and I wanted to put a complete spin on that line. Enjoy!
Panel 1 - A close-up shot of Wolverine's face, with half his face burned off and the hair on that side of his head obviously singed and burning. His face is battle scarred and there are some open wounds and bleeds.
Dialogue box across the top of the panel:
"You wanna know what pain is? You don't know pain, bub, until you've met me."
Panel 2 - Wolverine fighting Sabretooth
Dialogue box: "I've been in more scraps than any one person could possibly have. I was born with a chip on my shoulder and a berzerker temper to match it. I'm the little guy, but unlike him, I'm no pushover and give as good as I take."
Panel 3 - Weapon X facility. Wolverine is naked in a human-sized test-tube, his face filled with anguish. Scientists standing around him are injecting adamantium into his pores (you might want to check the Marvel Comics Presents comics or any online image reference about the Weapon X project and how Wolverine got his adamantium, Theo) Wolverine lets out a loud scream of pain.
Dialogue box: "The Weapon X project taught me the true meaning of pain. When you get hot molten metal injected into your pores, you'll know what I mean."
Panel 4 - Wolverine getting the adamantium pulled out of him by Magneto a la the cover (and interior) of X-Men #25
Dialogue box: "And just when I thought the pain could get no worse, along came Magnus to show me how wrong I was."
Panel 5 - Wolverine with his claws popped and his finger beckoning, a la the Frank Miller cover of Wolverine #1 (mini-series) (Click on the link to see the cover, Theo! Perhaps a "Snikt!" somewhere in the panel would be good as well)
Dialogue box: "But whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger.
Panel 6 - Same panel as the last one, but with Wolverine's half burned face and singed hair, a la the first panel of this script.
Dialogue box: "I'm the best there is at what I do, and what I do isn't very nice."
Panel 7 - The camera pulls out and we can see Wolverine standing behind a BBQ grill, with the flame reaching just below his face. It has obviously all gone wrong for him with the flame burning half his face off. Stuck on each of his three claws that have been popped (lower down, so that they aren't visible in the other previous panels) are three separate sausages...feel free to use either chicken wings or whatever else you want to signify that he's at a BBQ.
There are several other X-men at the BBQ and they're all standing impatiently in line, holding plates. Jubilee (or Jean Grey or any other X-Man you can think of that would be funny for this scene) is first in line and she is tapping her foot impatiently.
Jubilee: "Are you done yet?"
Wolverine: "Shut up."